Stop the War Within

It’s Day 4 of using my Fitbit to the fullest. Given what happened in Paris yesterday, it feels ridiculous, insignificant and narcissistic to write about my journey with an activity tracker. I think we’re all struggling to figure out what we can do or say.

One of the first things I did on Facebook was to share French artist Jean Jullien’s “Symbol of Peace for Paris.” Thanks to social media, overnight it’s become a unifying symbol for peace in France and beyond.

According to a Times article, Jullien had just started his vacation when he heard about the terrorist attacks that killed more than 120 people in his native France. The professional illustrator picked up his brush because he didn’t know what else to do.

Like Jullien, creative expression is all I have – beyond prayer, and I am praying.

I do believe in what Mahatma Gandhi said: “We must become the change we want to see in the world.” And so I believe that to affect peace in the world, I have to, first and foremost, be at peace with me.

What I realized in the past four days is that I’m no longer at war with my body. I’m not beating up on myself for landing at nearly 163 pounds again. At age 52, I’m driven, not by the vision of a bikini body, but by the desire to remain healthy, strong and flexible for the next half of my life.

I have my eye on 140 pounds because I can imagine that dropping nearly 23 pounds will do my body good. It might help my back, neck and foot issues. It might keep me out of a cardiologist’s office (where I spent my last birthday).

Yesterday I went to the chiropractor for my low back and neck issues. I couldn’t be happier to have found this person, thanks to my brother-in-law’s recommendation. He spent nearly an hour with me. He shared his approach – a holistic approach that I believe in wholeheartedly.

Today, I feel a million times better, not just because of what he did for me in his office yesterday, but because I can tell already that moving more and eating less is helping. I tucked my shirt in and wore a belt. My jeans feel roomier. My legs feel stronger. I feel so much better after just four days and it excites me to no end to think about how I might actually feel 40 days from now.

After some 40 years of warring with my body, I’m at peace today. It’s not world peace, but maybe, hopefully, at some level it contributes to peace.

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Stop the War Within
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